Friday, January 02, 2004 It's about time I stopped pretending and embraced my life style choice. Yes, I'm coming out, on my bog. I am...a hermit. There's no use trying to fence words or pretty it up. I am a hermit, but with better body-care habits. So, I'm a Yardly's rose smelling hermit. And you know, when you see hermits on the Telly, people always say things like, "I'd go crazy, being a hermit and staying all hide bound in the middle of no where, rarely seeing people." But you know, it's easy. The longer you do it, the easier it gets. Now it's an effort to go out to the movies, or go shopping. And I tend to really dress up, as if it's an occasion. Eyeing my red velvet dress and Emma Peel boots, the girl at the local grocery store asked me, "what's the occasion?" "Breathing." I said, demonstrating with a deep breath that I let out with a sigh and a smile. And I've forgotten how to disemble. See, disembling is an art that I once was a queen of. You could ask me an opinion about something, and unless it was life and death or something that would end up being horrobly embarrasing, (at which time I'd save you) I'd say something so bland and nice that you'd have an impression that I'd actually told you what I thought and better yet, it agreed precisly with your thoughts on the subject. Now I have no clue. I find myself blurting things out before they ar even formed. A few weeks back, trying to convince my friend that I really *did* want red hair but I was dying it close to my own brown color, I said that Brown was the worst hair color in the world. Which, if they didn't all love me, or at least know me enough to put up with me, would have insulted every single person in the car. And probably most of the people who read this blogger. Seriously, I think brown hair is nice. I like my hair color, and try to preserve it while removing the worse of the grey. But you see what I'm saying. I would rather be a hermit, in some ways. I love being able to write, to dream, to try and live a life different from what I know I'll have if I give into temptation and give up. And I have all of you, really, so what else does a hermit need? In the mail, five minutes ago, I recieved The Voice of Fire by Alan Moore and Alex Robinson's BOP! I didn't request them, but I can't wait to read them. The publisher is really a sweetie. And, Top Shelf Productions publishes some of *the* finest books in the world. And, for no reason other than I feel like saying it: Do not be ashamed when you fixate on a person or a charcater -- as long as you realize it's just smoke and time passing it's ok. We all need things to fixate on, charcaters for our dreams. Permalink Cindy scribed this at 3:22 PM 0 comments

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