To feed on hope, to pine with feare and sorrow.
Monday, April 02, 2007I should be updating my book list, in preparation for the book sales that are kicking off, but instead, I feel restless. One, I’m worried about work, which I’m sure will pass. I’m doing good work, but one always worries that one is not good enough, or not as good as one was. It’s been very busy of late, so many troubles at once that need to be taken care of now. Two, tomorrow is the big day. I’ve managed not to think of it over much for these past weeks, but now it’s…tomorrow. I can’t say that my life is going to change if the Chocolatier’s Wife makes it to the next level, because there are so many left to go. It’s sort of like the couple of times I had convinced myself that I would win the Lottery, and become very rich. I was sure that it would happen, that my life was going to change, because I needed it to so badly. I wanted it to, so badly. But I did not. (If I did this journal would be called Letters to the World and feature photos from every place I’d traveled.) In a way, since there were over 2,500 entries, it’s the same thing. Almost impossible. Silly to hope on it too much. But I do. Because it’s the hope that one needs to keep us going. If I make it through the next level, I will still have hope. I will feed off of it and day dream and feel positive. If I don’t, I’ll be sad and a bit low and silly for the whole of the day, and then the next, I will shrug, and say, “Well, I can go on from here.” And I can. But I still feel nervous. PS...the above is an Edmund Spenser quote, one of the ones I have posted on my cubicle wall. The quote goes: Full little knowest thou that hast not tride, What hell it is in suing long to bide: To loose good dayes, that might be better spent; To wast long nights in pensive discontent; To speed to-day, to be put back to-morrow; To feed on hope, to pine with feare and sorrow. Permalink Cindy scribed this at 10:08 PM 0 comments |